Category Archives: Edumacation


For many years, the boy has said that he wants to be a chef and/or an architect when he grows up. Lately, though, he’s been saying that he wants to be an engineer. I asked him why he wants to be an engineer instead of a chef or an architect, and he said it’s because he wants to 1) build things, 2) experiment with things, and 3) make lots of money.

I told him that an engineer doesn’t necessarily make more money than a chef or an architect, but he said he doesn’t really care. The driving force behind his current career aspiration is the ability to make things, opposed to having to talk or write about things, like what I do for a living.

It’s a funny feeling to realize that my kid isn’t going to be a writer (thank the goddess) or an artist (which is kinda sorta sad and stuff). I guess our brains are just wired differently, and despite the fact that the boy has two artsy-fartsy-ish dads who aren’t scientifically minded, the boy seems to be.


screentimeBefore I became a dad, I told myself that any of my future kid(s) would be able to consume as much electronic media as he or she wanted. Now that I’m actually a dad, and I have a son who is obsessed with electronic media, I’m starting to have second thoughts. I mean, it was fine when the boy was little, like, before he was in school and stuff, but I think his consumption of electronic media is starting to get in the way of him being a productive member of second-grade society. Plus, I’m starting to have visions of my son at age 20, and he’s living in my basement playing Minecraft all-day-long.

So I’m trying out this new parenting technique that I like to call “limited screen time after dinner.” Here’s how it works:

  • After homework and dinner, the boy is allowed a set amount of screen time before bedtime.
  • I’ll set a timer, say, for 15 minutes, and when the timer goes off, the boy’s screen time is done.
  • Once the timer goes off after 15 minutes, the boy will renegotiate for additional screen time, at which point I’ll add 10 minutes to the clock.
  • After 10 minutes, I’ll tell the boy that he’s done with screen time, and he’ll invariably ask for five more minutes of time.
  • I’ll concede and give him five more minutes of screen time.
  • Once five minutes have passed, and the boy has used a total of 30 minutes of screen time for the evening, I’ll turn off all of the lights in the house and hide in my bedroom while the boy begrudgingly brushes his teeth and gets ready for bed.

I’ll readily admit that it’s not a very well-thought-out technique. So sue me, sheesh!

valentine's-dayThe boy’s school winter break (which starts tomorrow) happens to coincide with Valentine’s Day this year,  so I thought we were in the clear for having to provide Valentine’s Day crap for the boy’s classmates. Turns out the boy’s class is having its classroom VD party today, which means we had to scramble this morning to pull together cards and stuff for the boy’s teachers and classmates. Luckily, I bought an adorbz  set of Star Wars-themed VD cards a while back, so the boy won’t be the only kid in class who doesn’t participate in the treacle.

I guess I’m as romantical as the next dude, which is to say probably not much, thus I have mixed feelings about inculcating my son into a practice as schmaltzy and commerce-driven as Valentine’s Day. Call me a curmudgeon, but I think we should be careful with our love. Real love isn’t something that we should toss around as if it comes in unlimited supply. I’m not talking about like or whatevs, which is fine to share in abundance, but real, true love is precious and we should limit the love we share with only those we actually love.

I’m probably projecting a bit. I’m glad that my son has a seemingly unlimited supply of love, but I don’t want him to give out his love so easily to peeps who don’t return it. TBH, some of the boy’s classmates just aren’t love-worthy cuz they are mini-douchebags. And yet, there we were this morning, writing out love letters to a bunch of jerks.


I dunno, since I’ve had Strep Throat, I’ve been kinda sorta spacey lately. I think the antibiotics that I’m on are punching holes in my brain and I’m forgetting to do and/or keep track of shizz that I’m supposed to do and/or keep track of. Apparently the boy was supposed to do a shizzton of homework over the weekend, and I didn’t realize that stuff was due today until three minutes before the boy was gonna walk out the door with his nanny and go to school.

The boy had a reading assignment and a book report on snakes. Do you know how long it takes a seven-year-old to do a second grade reading assignment and a book report on snakes? Three minutes. Cuz as soon as we realized that shizz had to get done, the boy went to werk. My son might be a genius. I’m just sayin’.

Tonight’s homework assignments included online math and another reading assignment that involved creating words with plastic letters. It was awight.