Monthly Archives: February 2013

Since I was able to work my way through a ginormous stack of TPS reports, I decided to clear my head and go for a walk around the neighborhood with one of my busy business lady colleagues. On our way back to the office, I treated myself and my busy business lady colleague to some hot chocolate.

As I was placing our order with the chocobarista, I asked my busy business lady colleague what kind of hot chocolate she wanted, and she said, “Obvs, I like my hot chocolate like I like my men: dark with some foam on top!” And I said, Oh, um, I guess I like my hot chocolate like I like my men, too: white with a beard. And my busy business lady colleague was all, “You are hands down the weirdest Executive Busy Business Lady at the office.” And I was all, I’m kidding! Obvs, white chocolate can’t grow a full beard, yo! A goatee, maybe, but not a full beard. Sad face.

And then we laughed and laughed a super-evil laugh! The mommy bloggers at the chocolate shop looked at us like we were hopped up on the pot or something. Whatevs.

Walking to work this morning, I spied a poster for a new documentary about, um, Greedy Lying Bastards. Apparently there are someponies who are greedy, who lie and stuff, and who are bastards. And apparently these greedy lying bastards also happen to run the government and control the media. It would all be so hi-larious if it wasn’t so terrifying and evil.

Don’t get me started on the idiots who don’t believe in climate change. Everypony knows that these morons have their hands so deep in the pockets of Big Business that they are practically giving each other reach-arounds. Blech.

After lunch, DBD suggested that we get some gelato at the fancy-schmancy Italian market in my office building. And, of course, I was all, Oh golly jeepers, no, I can’t have gelato in the middle of a workday! And DBD was, “Who are you and what have you done with lazy dad, yo!?!” Then I was all, I’m kidding, obvs!!! Let’s get some gelato and stuff!!!

So we did. And it was super-yum!

I’m always tickled-slash-troubled whenever I spy random shizz on the street while I’m commuting to work. I suppose sometimes the stuff is worthless, but other times I’m certain that somepony is missing something important.

It’s rainy and craptastic in the northeast today, and on my walk this morning from the train station to my office in the city, I spied a lonely potato in a puddle by the curb. It was sad and stuff because I imagine that maybe that lonely potato was destined for bigger and greater things, like maybe it was supposed to grow up to be the star of a yum poutine or play a featured role in a nice corn chowder. But instead the lonely potato was carelessly tossed aside in the rain like some kind of common trash.

I thought about rescuing the lonely potato from its sad fate on the mean streets of New York City, but then I realized that I’m evil and stuff now, so I walked away without giving that lonely, homeless potato a second thought.

OK, full disclosure: I actually picked up the lonely potato and put it in a trash can because I might be evil, but I still believe that vegetables and stuff deserve at least of modicum of dignity. Plus, littering isn’t cool.

Hey everypony, if you’re looking for a new photoblog to follow, let me recommend Through the Filter, a lovely collection of pics created by a terrifically talented photographer.

OK, full disclosure: the blogger in question is my super-sweet and super-talented nephew Avi, who is a student at U-Dub. Obvs, I’m biased, but seriously, the kid has some mad skillz behind the camera lens.

Also, for an upcoming Flashback Friday, I’ll share of pic of Avi in the Jedi Knight Halloween costume that I made for him when he was, like, four years old. Trust me, it’s super-kawaii!

After an early morning onslaught of stupidity a fairly uneventful morning at the office, I met up with one of my favorite busy business lady friends for some mid-day coffee, hot chocolate, and gossip at the local chocolatier-slash-coffee shop.

I’ll tell you what, getting out of the office for an hour and chatting with a normal human being was a nice, much-needed diversion. We both admitted our secret passion for reading parenting blogs written by crazy, super-religious, oddly opinionated, interesting moms (and dads) because it’s like watching a soap opera and/or watching a train wreck in slow motion.

I told my busy business lady friend that my ultimate goal was to be a stay-at-home dad, and she told me that she, too, would like to stay at home for a while when she had a kid. The truth is, the line of busy business lady work that we’re in isn’t exactly rocket science. Despite what someponies in the biz think, we’re not curing cancer.

There’s probably more to life than writing Very Important E-mails and Eating Shit for Very Important Mildly Incompetent Executives. At least that’s what the Scientology brochure Watchtower magazine I’m reading said.

When the busy business lady betches at work are totes bringing me down or I’m swamped with writing Very Important E-mails and TPS reports for imbeciles, I like to quote noted American philosopher and philanthropist Jinkx Monsoon. Because guurrl is fierce and stuff

Is it Friday yet?