When my family first moved to Hawaii when I was a kid, my dad spray-painted silver a macadamia nut tree and used it as the Christmas tree for our very first Christmas someplace where it didn’t snow. My sisters and I were mortified, and the Lazy Family Christmas with the weird silver macadamia nut Christmas tree has since become family legend.

Back then, I didn’t understand what my dad was thinking, but as an adult, I totally admire his subversive sense of humor. I mean, it was freakin’ Hawaii! That’s what people in Hawaii do, right?

Busy daddy and I used to set up fancy Christmas trees (before the boy arrived), but honestly, it seemed so wasteful to have a dead tree in our house for a few weeks and then throw it out. We’ve had potted trees, but they’re usually tiny and kind of meh.

For the past few years, we’ve set up fake Christmas trees. However, we figured that if we were going to have a fake tree, we wanted it to look as fake as possible, not at all like a real tree. This year, we decided to go to town and get the fakest-looking tree we could find.

Busy daddy had second thoughts at first. He said, “I’m worried that it’s going to be offensive.” I said, Who’s going to be offended? God? Baby Jesus? I’m sure they have a sense of humor and/or an eye for the fabulous.

If this year’s Busy-Lazy Family Christmas tree was a drag queen (and let’s face it, all Christmas trees are basically normal trees in drag), ours would be named Fantasia Barrino D-Luxe. It’s freakin’ awesome, purple and silver glitter/disco balls and all!

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