My office MoBros team takes a weekly team photo and solo snaps to show the progress of our individual ‘staches. Pictured above is my week-three update. Yeah, I know it’s ridiculous.

Earlier in the morning, one of my co-workers said to me, “Dude, where’s your mustache?” I said, It’s in my pocket. Where do you think it is? It’s on my face! And she said, “That’s it?” And then I said, Yeah, that’s it. She said, “Oh. Sad face.” Then she gave me a stick-on mustache because she felt sorry for me.

Everyone else on my MoBros team doesn’t seem to be having any trouble sprouting legit mustaches, so I’m totally banking on sympathy donations. Or you can donate to busy daddy’s MoBros team, which is werking it a little bit more than I ever could.

Side note: I really need a haircut.

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